5 Dumbest Things Said When Being Thrown Out Of The Bar

The behavior of so called "adults" still manages to surprise me at times. Ranging in age from "just turned 21" to "over 60", here's a few of my favorite, dumbest things people have said to me and my coworkers at the bar. Beginning with my all time personal favorite.

1. "Do you know who I am?? Do you know who my father is?? I am old Fort Worth money!" <says the girl with red lipstick smeared across her face while she struggles valiantly to get to her feet and stand on her own.

2. "That's it buddy! Fuck you and this bar! You're fired! Enjoy your last night working here! I'm buying this whole place and firing you on Monday!"

3. "So if someone throws up they can't stay?" <after their friend provided us with a spectacular, projectile display reminiscent of Monty Python, that spanned across the length of a table and onto the wall.

4. "Build that wall! That's right I voted for Trump! Build that wall! Look at your kicks bro! I'm coming for you! I got yo face! Ima remember you!"

5. "No no no it's ok. I'm fine. Can I finish my drink? I'm gonna finish my drink." <after creating some kind of gastrointestinal slip and slide in the bathroom and being assisted with determining which direction is up.

It never fails though. The reactions that people have when consuming alcohol are so random. It can be any age or demographic. Ya just never know what you're gonna get if you're in charge of dealing with them. At least sometimes it's thoroughly entertaining.


A few tracks some of you out there might enjoy. Check out Krizz Kaliko representing KC, MO and Stormzy throwin up some Grime out of the U.K.

To secure ourselves against defeat lies in our own hands, but the opportunity of defeating the enemy is provided by the enemy himself.